ICut
by foreverfearlessgirl13
Summary: Sam has a cutting problem. Can a certain nub help her? *First story*
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

The blood flowed over her skin, a deep bubbling red. She lifted the piece of glass slowly. She felt relieved. She was Sam Puckett and she didn't deal with feelings particularly well. She had low tolerance for the heartbreak, loneliness, pain and sadness. To express meant using sharp object and cutting was the only way.

(Freddies point of view)

I walked into Carly's apartment in avery good mood. It was friday, which meant the of a long week at school and Carly's, Sam's and my webcast which we call ICarly. We did the most randomest things and it was alot of fun. There did'nt seem to be anyone around in her apartment which was unusual but oh well. I walked upstairs to the studio to start prepping for the show and saw Sam inside listening to her PearPod. I groaned out of reflex. Sam was alot to handle but I loved her. We had dated but ended up calling it off. Things were still very akward between us and we rarley ever spoke nowadays. "Hey" "Oh, um hi!" "Soooooooooooo Whats up?" Nothing going to go get some ham."Bye" I said to the door as it shut. What is her problem? I thought about it. I just don't know. I wish we were back to our old fighting selves. But it will take along time to get back to that.


	2. Chapter 2

Sam's point of view

"Hey" Freddie said to me.

"Oh, um hi!" why is he talking to me? I hate awkwardness. Why did we even agree to date? Now were over and it hurt. A lot. Still.

"What's up?" he asked casually.

"Nothing much I'm going to get some ham! Bye!" Why let it is awkward and I really, really needed to cut. It hurt me that he dint act like we had any history. I rushed downstairs into the bathroom and found my piece of glass. The night Freddie and I broke up; I was walking the street of Seattle when I saw what I thought was money but turned out to be a piece of glass. I picked it up and it cut me but it actually seemed to ease the hurt. So I used it to cut. Even though I knew it was bad, I needed to cut I couldn't help myself. I rolled up my sleeve and dragged it across my arm. The blood bubbled up and instant pain and relief shot through my arm. I grabbed a towel stopped the blood and pulled my sleeve back down. Much better I thought.

"Hey Sam!" Carly said because she is everything that I'm not and more and she gets all the guys. The only guy I ever loved had broken up with me. Carly was perfect.

"Hey Carly. What's up?

"Nothing much. How are you?

"Just peachy."

"Let's go up to the studio"

"Kay."

General point of view

The group had a successful show. As always they ha d a ton of viewers. And as always they were absolutely hilarious. No one suspected anything as wrong with Sam. I mean she was the same happy, joking Sam right? Well just about everyone but Freddie.


	3. Chapter 3

Carly's pov

I don't know what's up with Sam and Freddie but it's really getting on my nerves. They avoid each other like the plague. Sam's been really quiet lately, I'm kind of nervous because with her that's not really a good thing.

"Hey, I'm going for a walk Carls, bye" Sam says as she's nearly out the door.

"You go on walks?" Freddie asks incredulously. It is amazingly surprising that sam's going on a walk because usually she very lazy but whatever tickles her pickle.

"Yeah I do, get over it." Sam says as she walks out the door.

"What is up with her?" Freddie asks the second she's gone.

"I don't know. You should talk to her" even though those two broke up there's still a small fire in me that they will still end up together. Yup I love seddie aren't they so dang adorable. I don't care what it took these two were miserable broken up and hated that. Plus maybe we could all go back to normal. Normal be nice.

"Why me?

"Well you were her boyfriend and she loves you."

"Yeah I know but-"

"Please for me?" That's the thing I've been doing since sixth grade. I shoot him those bambi eyes and he can't help but agree.

"Oh fine, but you have to pay the hospital bills."

"Oh and ill talk to her tomorrow at school. At least she can't injure me too bad."

I roll my eyes and smile. Sam wouldn't hurt Freddie too bad she loves him way too much. Gibby just ran down the stairs. Shirtless. Oh boy. What now?

"Spencer has a bucket on his head and he accidently set it on fire." He says. I jump up and race upstairs. There is never a dull moments living with Spencer Shay. It might annoy me but I still love him.

Sam's pov

I walked out of carlys apartment. Then I went to the fire escape. It s kind of me and Freddie's special place. Me mostly but it is where we first kissed. I turn on my Peapod and Adele's "someone like you" comes on. I listen to it. It might have not been the best, norm lest or greatest relationship but it was ours. I think it's raining and that I'm getting wet. I wonder why it's only my face and then I realize that I'm crying. I honestly cannot take this song anymore. I switch my peapod to Taylor swifts "ours". This song makes me think of all the good memories we had. The kiss at the lock in, him kissing me to prove he was love with me at the mental hospital, our first kiss. All those kisses made sparks fly between us like those typical teen magazine say. His strong arms around me feeling like nothing could ever hurt me. Every time that he'd ever walked d up to me and how my heart skips a beat. I miss it so much. I miss him and I miss us. I think tonight might have some real bleeders.


	4. Chapter 4

Freddie pov

I barley slept at all last night. I'm really getting worried about Sam. First thing I do when I when get to Ridgeway Monday morning is go to her locker. I see her wearing a hoodie which is really weird considering its may.

"Hey"

"Hi Benson" oh god I miss her now that I'm looking into those crystal blue eyes. Control Freddie! Control!

"How are you doing?"

"Peachy"

"Why are wearing a hoodie in the middle of May and being so quiet?" Good doing Benson way to buy subtle as I mentally smacked myself.

"Because I want to. When did you turn into a freaking cop?"

She turns and walks away to homeroom and I have no choice but to follow her because we have homeroom together. She and I both sit together. I sit down and look at her she is writing in a notebook and where her sleeve is rolled up I can see cuts. I wonder what they are from. Frothy maybe?

"Since when do you do homework?"

"Its not homework. "

"Then what is it?"

"Its mind your own business Benson."

It's going to be a long day considering we have most of our classes together and we sit together in almost all of them. Sam doesn't do well next to people she hates which is most of Ridgeway because Sam hates people. So of course they thought me and her would be good seat partners. But it gives me a good chance to find out what is wrong with her.

*H**ey sorry for such a short chapter. I'll update soon but I'm a reallllllly slow typer lol. :)***


	5. Chapter 5

I see Sam and Freddie walk into the cafeteria together. I wonder if he's talked to her yet. They sit down at our usual corner table with me. Freddie then goes to join the lunch line. Sam sits down next to me and pulls out her lunch.

"Hey Sam! How's it going girl?"

"Good! You?"

"Peachy!"

"What do you have for lunch? I ask.

"Ham sandwich, fat cakes, peppy cola and an apple. What about you?" Typical Sam.

"Oh god! I'm scared to look Spencer packed my lunch for me. Okay let's see I have I have a pudding cup, a fork? And a peanut butter and what? BUTTER? He gave me a peanut butter and butter sandwich!"

Sams laughing so hard she can hardly breathe. Why can't I have a normal big brother?

"Well that's incredibly sucky." Sam says still laughing.

"Hey "Freddie says as he sets his tray down.

"Hi" I and Sam say happily. Or at least I did. She said it kind of glumly.

"So what's going on?" he asked happily.

"Eating and sitting'"

"What about you Puckett?"

"Nothing Freddie. Look I've go to go."

"You haven't finished your lunch yet"

"I'm not hungry. Bye!"


	6. Chapter 6

Sam's point of view

I walk out of the cafeteria and head toward my locker. I am having a major emotional freak-out and I don't even know why it's kind of pathetic. Fighting back tears I open my locker grab my glass and shut the door. I scramble to get to the bathroom; I really don't want to have anyone see me cry even if it is Freddie. Soon I hear footsteps following me. Great, I knew them too. They were **HIS**. Like the boy that I loved but constantly beat on, who was a nub. He just had to come after me now! Lovely. On the bright side a t least it wasn't Gibby.

"Hey Sam, wait up!" Oh my god, out of all times now the nub wanted to have a convo. I hurriedly tried to dry my eyes while keeping a composed look.

"What?" I mumbled looking at the floor and facing away from him.

"Are you okay?" No, I'm not okay but you are too caught up in my best friend to notice.

"Yes, I'm fine Freddington." I lied.

"Why'd you leave? Lunch is your favorite class."

"Because freddork, I have this thing called a bladder, I'm really not sure if you would know this but every once in a while I have to empty it." Ohh that sounded harsh but maybe he'd leave me the heck alone.

"Hey were you crying? Your eyes are all red." Crap crap crappitty carp. Out of all things.

"No Freddog, I wasn't crying. Now if you shall excuse me I'm going to empty my bladder, bye" with that I left. I hurried into the bathroom. Praise the lord no one was there! I hurried into a stall and locked it. I pulled out my glass and pulled it across my arm. The blood streamed out and my adrenalin kicked in the awesomeness, the power, the control of it all was spectacular. I put down the glass and relived the past few moments. These were the few times I felt happy. Then it either wore off and life had to give me one of those o h so true reality moments that kicked it back to my sadness. I've always wished that I could have a boyfriend but never really found one that loved me and wouldn't leave me for Carly. I wish I could have Freddie. I mean we kissed for god freaking sake that's really has to mean something. At least it does to me. To him probably not. I probably should get back to lunch now. I mean I was just going to pee not reminisce on my whole stupid life. Just then the door swung open jarring me out of my thoughts. Shoes started across the floor toward me. I know those shoes…..

******Sorry my lovely people that bother to read my things. I haven't been able to update in a while. Life wasn't being very kind to me. I'll update soon. Cliffhanger… whose shoes were they? You'll find out in the next chapter! :) *******


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